X is for Xenacious

May 6, 2020 , In: Expat Mommy , With: No Comments

I think I could have easily finished this A to Z blogging challenge without learning any new words. But suddenly I felt like I should at least use one blog to find out the meaning of a new word. I was going to use the X-day entry to write about Xanax, a wonderful drug I have consumed plenty of. But it seems only fitting that I would write about change and the deep yearning for change. Xenacious is my new word of the day, and Merriam-Webster’s Word Central defines this adjective as “filled with a yearning for change.”

(adj) yearning for change

What a fun word it is, even if I don’t even know how to pronounce it. But I know I have a xenacious feeling inside my body, and I want to make some simple yet big changes that will affect me and my wolf pack in healthy ways. Some people won’t agree with the choices I make to become healthier and happier and that’s ok.

I am sick of standing in the same place and doing what I am “supposed” to do. We don’t change because we are afraid that things will turn out worse, so we don’t want to take that risk. I have been living like this for quite some time, sitting still, wishing things won’t turn out worse. But I have just realized things can’t get worse. I have hit rock bottom! I have been there and I have touched it. I have this deep xenacious feeling inside of me and keep thinking, “What if ?”

I believe that many people all over the world would want their lives to go back to the way it was. My life was just alright before this virus suddenly popped up and changed our world. What we don’t understand is that many things were already not right in the world in the first place. We should all change our ways of life just a little bit.

Can you imagine if the richest people of this planet would give some to the poorest and disadvantaged members of society? We would change for the better. What if we ask our neighbor a bit more about how they actually are? We would all change for the better. What if we all take care of our earth a bit more?The world would change for the better.

What if we all act on that xenacious feeling inside of us? Things would be hard at first, but it would be fucking worth it. I know it!


I found this poem online while researching this word by Carl Wayne Jent

I’m so fed up with this place
so xenacious could just scream
been planning my exit out of here
started my escape early last year
staying, my life will be a waste
beginning all over is my one dream.

Bought my car, saved some cash
before sunrise I will leave
not telling anybody where I’ll go
later send a card so they’ll know
will pack clothes, leave here fast
in the morn, they won’t believe.


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